i hate him. he sux....but tt's coz i love him. i expect soooo much tt i'm demanding. i hate i when i say i miss him and he doesn't miss me. i hate it when i stare right at him next to him and he pays me no attention. therefore i hate him. but i hate it more when i love him so much. maybe it's time to let go but i can't. he's my motivation to go back to teach. i did it..coz he told me to. damnit. but i did. it's silly i noe to love so deeply...so deeply tt he has almost removed corn completely from my heart. so deeply i'm sure i can love him forever no matter wat disagreements arise. i'm willing to give and give and give and nvr take if t's wat's needed to keep a r/s going for this aries scorpio combi.

i wld give anything for him. yet in e face of my giving.as i rush to his place...as i stay overnite at my coz's for e possibility of seeing him hough i need to rush up at 9 am e next day...i did it all..for wat i noe is hopeless yet i cannot totally give up hope. i can keep awake doing nothing till he msg me tt he can't make it after midnight...will i ever love anyone else by e same extent again i dunno....but i dun want to give up...coz tt's letting myself down....

so........i'll jiayou!! even if all i meet is disappointment....tt's better than total hopelessness and giving up. coz at least perhaps there will be new memories to be collected.

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