...
suddenly a phrase came to mind...and tt phrase is 卑微. bei wei. i feel so small, insignificant coz of him. after not speaking for 2 mths...i thought tt perhaps i can just tell him abt eth. but e moment i clicked tt all-too-familiar nick and e window popped up...i felt all e air being sucked from my world. and i cldn't breathe anymore. then i realized sth. i've been thinking abt one particular issue for the whole of today and suddenly a new light was shed on it.
i admit tt i was angry with 'knocking'. shall not say who is 'knocking' coz it's so absurd. absurd tt he's trying to stuff me into his mold of a perfect gf. when i dun even want to play e gf part and there's nth betwn us mahz. but he seems to keep stuffing me into tt mold. -_-. like i must like kids? i shld get e same phone as him? and tt he respects my decision if i decide to get a diff phone as if it's so serious tt two ppl have different phones and how he decides to be e xiao nan ren behind me when i run for eth. i guess i'm just irritated tt these things are forced upon me. and i just dun want to upset the current balance. our past times were so happy lahz. w/o this crap.
maybe i have a chronic disorder...i dun like ppl who like me. too irritating.